Swimwear

Hello ladies. Remember how you have been scrutinizing yourself in the mirror all year? And what about all of those commercials that reminded you that you could be bouncier, skinnier, more sudsy and giggle-ier? Yeah I remember too. In fact I am reminded every day that I need to go on an Acai (or something) diet, and bust through cellulite, remove stretch marks and drink light beer when I party.
It's not just me getting the message, day in and day out either. Any husbands out there sports fans? GREAT! Then you understand that there is no better place for men to find that same message, underscored by cool guitar riffs and loud crashy cool dude rock and roll synchronization.
So now that you know you don't measure up gals, what will you do? Well since you look so awful naked, why don't you put a patch over both breasts, your crotch and a portion of your ass and walk into the brightest sunlit illumination of the year for all the world to have a look?
O.K. so that just doesn't make a lot of sense does it. In fact, men get that! They wouldn't DARE expose themselves to that degree. Are you kidding? In fact that's HILARIOUS! Men in tiny bathing suits is relegated to funny Europeans, and comedy schticks a la Jackass and the famous"Meet the Parent's" poolside scene. Can you imagine a man letting us get that close of an idea of how toned/untoned, and bulge-ess or bulgeless they are. We could make our decisions in a snap though. "Too small!" "Too fat!"Well I guess someone has put a stop to that kind of scrutiny...Yeah, men get it. They wear comfortable, sloppy, oversized board shorts. Imagine running on the beach in those ladies! Piece of cake!
So what are we doing? And why do we keep letting the culture tell us that all women, as a rule, are expected to strip every summer? Who is telling you to do that? Or, why are we continuing to allow the culture to make a mockery out of what women represent to men?
Women's liberation, my ass! Oops, I mean..."hey, look at my ass!"